Coaxium never sleeps

Solo: A Star Wars Story

Crit

Various irrelevancies:

• I'm grateful for the subtitle, without which I would have expected a biopic of talented but troubled former U.S. women's goalkeeper Hope Solo. The 3D might have seemed an odd choice, but Hope is larger than life
• Truly, they must have gone to a galaxy far away to find someone as bland as Alden Ehrenreich to play the title role. Apparently no actual pieces of furniture had the slot available in their schedules.
• Thing is, though, neither the lead actor's deep-space vacuousness nor the waste of Emilia Clarke in a role unworthy of a dragonmother matters. Because: see subtitle again.
• In fact, it's altogether fitting that the most engaging character be the feminist, socialist, ultimately revolutionary droid L3-37, voiced by Phoebe Waller-Bridge (and if you haven't watched Fleabag, begin immediately).
• Best human character, obviously Donald Glover's Lando (and if you haven't watched Atlanta, ditto)
• Did anyone else notice that John Williams cribbed a persistent phrase from "Hey Hey, My My"? Hey, steal from the best.

Did I like it, you ask? Another irrelevancy, really, but yeah, kinda.

Overnight angel

Tully

Crit

One of my favorite films of 2015 was Young Adult, so I was predisposed to love a film reuniting screenwriter Diablo Cody, director Jason Reitman, and star Charlize Theron, and I was loving the tale of motherhood and sisterhood until . . . well, I can't tell you until what without switching to invisible ink. If you're new to this Cheeseblabbery technique, simply use your mouse to define the text below, and you'll be able to read it--but only if you've seen the film or don't care about having it spoiled.

"Did you see it coming?" I asked the other guy who stayed to the end of the credits. "Oh, yeah," he said. "I saw it coming a mile away." "I didn't see it coming," I admitted, "but then again I didn't see it coming in Fight Club, either."

And there you have it: this is Fight Club, only with milk-tender boobs instead of fist-loosened teeth. I like Fight Club, but once I registered the theft, I couldn't feel as warmly toward this one anymore.